A church proclaimed “No Excuse Sunday” in one of its mailers. The Purpose: To make it possible for everyone to attend church next Sunday.
1) Beds will be placed in the fellowship hall for those who say, “Sunday is my only day to sleep.”
2) Eye drops will be available for those with tired eyes from watching TV too late on Saturday night.
3) Steel helmets will be provided for those who say, “The roof would cave in if I ever went to church.”
4) Blankets will be provided for those who think that the church is “Too Cold” and air-conditioning for those who think it is “Too Hot.”
5) We will reserve the front pews for those who like the pastor’s sermons and the back pews with earplugs for those who dislike his sermons.
6) Score cards will be provided for those who like to list the hypocrites present.
7) TV dinners will be provided for those who can’t go to church and cook the noon meal for the family.
8) We will have a selection of trees and shrubs for those who like to see GOD in nature as well as a putting green on the church grounds for those who say, “Sunday is my only day for Golf!”
9) The sanctuary will be decorated with Christmas poinsettias and Easter lilies for those who have never seen the church without them.